Old Time Hockey!

Let me tell you why I hate Versus...BECAUSE IT'S FREAKING VERSUS!!!
Nice work with that TV Contract Bettman, instead of staying with The World Wide Leader (ESPN) you signed the NHL to at TV deal with the frigging Outdoor Life Network which in theory was a great idea because so many hockey fans also like to hunt and fish so yeah it makes perfect sense to completely alienate the rest of your fan base. Dumbass.

Great commercial by Versus for the Stanley Cup Playoffs featuring the red goal light ("I am victory, I am defeat..."). No, really, I liked it, nice job. Also, another good thing about Versus is the voice of Mike Emerick calling the games, really takes me back to the days of NHL on Fox and the horribly awesome glowing puck..."You love to hate the glowing puck," Thanks Otter for chiming in.

Sweet Jesus do I need a dip. That first period was as my Grandma Maris says, "Nuckin Futs." It's fast, it's physical, and the Wings own a 3-1 lead after the first stanza. Colorado started off the scoring with a nice one timer past Ozzie from behind the net (Paul Stasny worries me) then Zetterberg scored on a nifty give and go with Datsyuk which words really cannot describe how pretty it was. Cleary scored on a shallow pop fly to right over Theodore's head (looked a lot like Pudge's homer against the Twins last week which my brother called an "alley-oop home run") then Franzen, who is an absolute mule out there, re-directed to give the Wings the two goal lead. Which is the worst lead in hockey.

On a different note, Tubaro called during the 1st and I spoiled the second goal for him because Comcast's HD is delayed at his place...yeah T life sure is tough isn't it? Oh and he was also watching the E! True Hollywood Story on Pink during the commercials...not that there's anything wrong with that. Mike Babcock's hair is looking particularly Ron Burgundy-esque tonight, I just hope he's not French Canadian. Flappy jawed white flag wavin homos. "I wonder what Mickey Redmond thinks of that call," excellent color commentary Otter, they don't call you the best in the business for nothing.

Meanwhile in Montreal (on CBC, Canadian TV rocks, mainly because they talk funny)...Mike Komisarek, one of my all time Michigan Hockey favorites, is a human wrecking ball and just earned a nice two minute penalty for slamming a Flyer into the boards just after the whistle...two minutes well worth it. Montreal ties up the game on a questionable short handed goal that is being reviewed as we speak due to a possible high stick by Kovalev. I love how the NHL does all of it's video review from Toronto by the way. And it's a goal and the French people erupt into a white flag waving fury.

Of course, as we are watching the CBC because Canadian people talk funny (have I mentioned that yet?) the Wings score again on a blast by Franzen (a FREAKING MULE!!!) and make it 4-1 in the second, which chases Jose from the game and sufficiently makes Barry Melrose eat his words for the day. Somewhere, Mickey Redmond is smiling a shit eating grin. I love it. More later...

Just to clear things up really quick a commenter (yes, people leave comments sometimes, well that was the first time but whatever feel free to comment) that I don't like Canada or her people which is simply not true. I have no issues with Canadian people...just French Canadian people. Just like I don't like a lot of American people...

Otter brought up a good point before the Avs made it a 4-3 game with a couple of decent goals (one assisted by Statsny) what happened to PASS?? PASS Sports was local sports before Fox bought all the rights to every competitive activity available. "Who's the owner of Fox? He should buy Versus and turn it back into PASS." Steve Otterbein ladies and gentleman.

In other news...a great night in the ghetto tonight. Otter and I enjoyed a nice Little Caesars Hot and Ready pizza (which caused T to exclaim, "Why don't you just give Mike Illicth ALL of your money?") and are now dipping some Skoal straight that I, um, borrowed from the dudes downstairs today when I was helping Krepps pack up his Mom's Ford Windstar for his trip back home to Pittsburgh. And for the record, I feel really bad about it but then again, times are tough and money is tight and c'mon, you can't leave a two tin roll just chilling on your porch in broad daylight while you're all at class...it's like leaving your car running in the parking lot across the street at 4am and not expecting anything bad to happen while you go have a couple beers. You can't fix stupid. Third period action coming up...

4:05 into the third and Mike Babcock's hair is still perfect. If Otter had a John Madden telestrator he would be circling Babcock's hair and going on a rant about how "not a single hair is out of place." The irony in Otter's obsession with Babcock's hair is that he shaves his head to look like Sean Connery in, "The Rock," or maybe it's more of an Ed Norton in, "American History X." Nope, nope, I got it...it's Moby, definitely Moby. Steve Yzerman's Tiger is Chris Shelton.

Versus is the master of the dramatic commercial, they just made professional bull riding look like a promo for Grey's Anatomy.

Budaj is absolutely standing on his head right now after he stones Zetterberg on a semi breakaway. I miss Jose already. And that J in "Jose" is a hard J, not a soft J, you know, like jogging. (Cue NBC "The More You Know" music here)

Around 4 minutes left in this one and we go to commercial and now Otter is pulling a Patterson and changes the channel to the replay of the Tigers game on FSD which we all already know what happened (the Tigers peckerslapped the Rangers again 8-2 for their first sweep of the season), luckily no goals this time.

Text message from Tubaro: "We are getting our asses kicked right now." Um, no shit T, the ice has for sure tilted down towards Ozzie and now with three to go it looks like the Wings are content with playing not to lose for the remainder of the game but c'mon boys, it's Ozzie in net, not Jesus.

Avs pull Budaj with just over a minute left and Mike Emerick is treating this last minute like it's the 1980 Olympics. Crowd chanting "OZZIE OZZIE OZZIE" and Osgood obliges with a HUGE save with 8.3 to go that caused the two idiots in this room to almost crap themselves.

RED WINGS WIN THEEEEEE RED WINGS WIN!!!

Now THAT was a great hockey game! Fast paced, hard hitting, great goaltending on both sides...this is going to be a great series.

ROCK THE OCT!!