Black Out?

Stars fans have been encouraged by the organization to wear black throughout the playoffs. Doesn't really look like it worked. Lots of white, green, red, yellow, and even some pastels in there. Way to try to be a fake ass Winnepeg, the team that started this whole "Everybody wear the same color" idea. Leave it to people from the greater Dallas area to not be able directions as simple as wearing a black shirt.

Ozzie is getting peppered with shots early on as this Dallas team looks like they've got a little bit of their jump back with the home ice. It's like the Wings are jet lagged or something. That hour time difference must be a real bitch. Wings on the powerplay with just over 12 minutes left in the 1st.

That was short lived, Hudler goes to the box after about 10 seconds of powerplay time for a very questionable hooking call. Sometimes you gotta let the boys play there stripes. Early on in the game the Wings are being out shot 5-1 and have spent a lot of time in their own end.

SHORTHANDED GOAL!! Datsyuk made a great play in his own end the brief penalty kill and started a nice odd man rush with Zetterberg and Rafalski. Tic Tac Toe passing and Datsyuk chipped it past Turco for the game's first goal.

Steve Ott is interviewed on the bench after the commercial break and this sends Patterson into a mild frenzy. "WHAT THE FUCK? That's fuckin stupid! If I were a coach and there was a goddamned reporter on my bench I'd go nuts! God...I HATE VERSUS!!" Glad to know that I'm not the only one who hates Versus. Speaking of Patterson, he left the bathroom door open and now our front door is open. I'll let you put the numbers together. "It's a total shit-fest in here!" Patty is all over it today folks. Otter is well...just kind of sitting there.

Dallas scores to even things up with 4:47 left in the first causing Ed Olzcyk and Mike Emerick to throw around the term "Happy Human" twice in less than ten seconds...Christ... But good news everyone...

DATSYUK HAPPENS! Just another breakout play and Datsyuk slips one under Turco after a nasty little pass from Holmstrom to the hard charging Pavel who tipped it just right. Turco though he had it but it just kept trickling through until it crossed the goal line to silence the Dallas faithful.

Maltby does a great job of getting under Hageman's skin and making him take a bad penalty to give the Wings a powerplay. Maltby barreled down on Hageman near the Red Wing bench and buried him with a the kind of check that really pisses you off. Hageman couldn't keep his cool and was called for roughing after he punched Maltby right in front of the little guy in the striped shirt. Nothing came of the powerplay but the more you can be on it the better.

And what the hell is this? The Stars have cheerleaders? You've got to be shitting me. Maltby wrecking balls Mattias Norstrom in the late seconds of the 1st and earns a two minute minor for being a hockey player. Just before the horn he also got a nice shot on Ribeiro who was attempting to fire one at Osgood. Take that ya dickhead. 2-1 lead after twenty minutes of play with much, much more to come.

Good God the Stars are really bringin it right now. Ozzie did great on the powerplay but later on Richards just kind of threw one at the net from the boards and sure enough it banged off of Stuart's leg and past Osgood to tie the game at 2. The ice has tilted and it is tilting the wrong way. That was Richard's first goal of the series and third of the playoffs if I heard right but who knows with these clowns in the broadcast booth.

The good news is, the Jack Link's Beef Jerkey commercial I just saw about made me piss myself. Flipping over a golf cart is no fun, well it's kind of fun as long as you or your clubs aren't seriously hurt. And now Versus is interviewing some slapdick cagefighter about his upcoming featherweight championship fight that will be broadcast, oddly enough, on Versus. Luckily nothing crazy happened or else I would have been all kinds of pissed off.

Halfway through the game and it seems to me that the Stars aren't letting the Wings get set up at all in the offensive zone. Turco isn't seeing nearly as much traffic in front of him in this game as he had in the previous two. Alot of that can be contributed to the fact that the Stars have pretty much outplayed the Wings through the first half of this game. Richards had another huge scoring opportunity but Ozzie was able to glide over and stack the pads to send the puck to the corner. I'm telling you, everything is coming up Stars right now. The Wings need to send out the goon squad and rough somebody up to try and take control of this game. It's like Thunderdome out there right now and not the good kind!

Just as soon as I write that Hudler breaks away and beats Turco with a nice backhand over the glove. McCarty made a GREAT play to move that puck out to Hudler who caught the Stars on a change and Reunion Arena is silent other than few brave Red Wings fans who made the trek or are Detroit area transplants.

Right after the goal Ozzie makes two big saves and in the ensuing scrum after he covered the puck, Samuelsson tried to rattle a few of Hageman's teeth loose with a nice crosscheck to the lips. Unfortunately he was sent off for two minutes to think about what he's done. The penalty box is hockey's equivalent to standing in the corner. The Wings kill off the penalty and did it so well that Ozzie didn't even have to face a shot. Nice kill there boys.

Modano just got wrecked by Draper and Maltby in the corner and the hits just keep on comin! It's like a bunch of rocks in a cement mixer out there. Holmstrom just had a golden opportunity to get a scoring chance but he forgot he was on ice for a second and fell right on his face. "What is this mighty mites hockey right now? Jesus!" Otter played mighty mites hockey and he knows what he's talkin about. Something tells me he spent a lot of time falling down out there.

The replay showed that Modano was expecting to be hit by Maltby but Drapes got him instead and he looks as if he doesn't know where he's at right now. Eh, just a little concussion, no big deal. Well, it's kind of a big deal but not like a huge deal. End of the second period and Otter switches it over to MTV to watch the Hills. I may live with closeted homosexuals. "What the hell was that?" Otter asked. "Eh, just a bunch of fat black chicks dancing." Patterson replies.

Wow.

The pride of Wayne Michigan Mike Modano is back on the bench with the Stars after a couple hits of smelling salts. And sure as shit, Turco whined enough and Homer goes to the box for goaltender interference. Turco caused that one, such bullshit but nevertheless the Wings have to kill off yet another penalty.

THAT WAS NASTY!!! Zetterberg dipsy doodles around Turco and Richards after going coast to coast on the penalty kill to make it 4-2! What a pretty goal that was. Highlights on SportsCenter if they can get their noses out of Lebron's taint long enough to put together a game recap.

The Wings just get done killing off their 5th penalty of the night and now they get to try and kill off another one on yet another soft ass hooking call on McCarty. That's 6 Red Wing penalties to Dallas' 2. Bound to be some even up calls coming later on...which could be nice. Zetterberg almost had another shorty but was robbed by Turco on a nice glove save out in the open.

With about 13 minutes left in the game the Wings seem to be content with their two goal lead and have slowed the pace of the game down by controlling the puck and calmly dumping and chasing into the zone while trying to keep fresh legs out there. Turco is doing his best old school Hasek impression and wandering around behind the net and scaring the crap out of Dallas fans by falling down behind the net. First day on skates guy?

Steve Ott just trucked Datsyuk into the boards after Turco freezes the puck after a scoring chance. Why you gotta be a goon dude? Zetterberg does a great job of pointing and yelling at the ref instead of helping his boy out. We need some goon on goon action here to make the fans happy. For some reason Ott doesn't go to the box for that. "Maybe he didn't get enough of him," Olzcyk says. I'm tired of saying Versus sucks, I really am. Maybe if i say it in Spanish...Versus Chupa! French, Versus Suce! German, Versus Lutscht! Russian, Против Сосет! You get the point.

Morrow landed VERY awkwardly on his left arm and it really didn't look pretty at all. No sign of him back on the ice just yet. Up, yeah there he is slamming into Rafalski in the Red Wing end. He's tough, he's a hockey player.

Red Wings are just passing the puck around, playing sound defensive hockey right now with 5 minutes to go in the game.

In other news, Patterson is elated when he tells us that he just broke his own high score in brickbreaker on his Blackberry. Congratulations Patty, you've earned it! Now put your shirt back on and watch the game.

Verus did something right just now and showed Marty Turco's all time record against the Wings. Two wins, twelve losses, five ties. Yikes. Utter and total ownage by the Red Wings.

SEND IN THE HATS!!! Pavel Datsyuk bangs home a one timer from Zetterberg to presumably bury the Stars for tonight. Robidas catches Dallas Drake with his head down in open ice which seems to be a moot point right now. But I can understand taking out a little bit of frustration with a nice clean open ice hit. I would do the same thing and you would too. And how bout the Dallas PA announcer trying to be as enthusiastic as possible announcing one minute left in the third. That's got to suck when your team is getting pounded and you have to act like you still give a shit. Time runs out and Journey's "Don't Stop Believin," plays on the speakers in Dallas.

You can stop believing now Dallas.



5 WINS AWAY!!!

Oh and tomorrow is Power to the People day here at TJS so leave your ideas in the comments section and I'll write about whatever you, my dear readers, want.